For just $34.99 USD, the Walk of Shame Kit can provide everything you need to survive the “act of going home the next morning and being embarrassed in your clothes from the night before” – and as a bizarre bonus, partial proceeds go to advancing breast cancer awareness! The kit comes complete with one-size-fits-most t-shirt (which dudes supposedly love because it means they “don’t have to worry about calling [you] to get [their] favorite tee back again”), sunglasses, flip flops, and a “Call Me/Don’t Call Me” card that allows you to bypass the nasty business of actual conversation. Just like the folks over at Jezebel, we think this kit is pretty ridiculous. We don’t appreciate slut shaming, even in the form of a cheesy gag gift. And we reserve the right to walk without shame or fear – wherever, whenever, and wearing whatever we want. Even rumpled evening wear.

[Oh, how original, looks like the makers of the Walk of Shame Kit have decided that feminine silence is chic! But the women at WAVAW will tell you exactly what we think – about corny slut-shaming products and all the rest of the toxic cultural muck we’re always wading through. That’s about the only reason we might need your flip flops.]