Getting an IUD: Reflections on negotiating sexuality in a rape culture
Guest Post by WAVAW Relief Staff, Faye
So Many Layers
Women face many barriers to making informed decisions about birth control – we live in a rape culture that shames us for our interest and proactiveness around sexual activity and health. Medical professionals have their own biases and assumptions about what’s best for each woman, based on everything they can see on our chart (cultural background from our names, age, weight/height ratio, gender, medical history) and by how they categorize us when we walk through the door (is she professional, immature, clean cut, alternative, heteronormative, gay, transgender, is there a ring on her finger, etc). Girls are raised hearing, explicitly or otherwise, that we should be doing all we can to stay away from sex. Only our single Prince Charming should be able to show up, plant upon us True Love’s Kiss, and charm our pants off (after a lot of coaxing, and probably against our will)…
I was able to book an appointment for an IUD insertion through Willow Clinic’s website, after which someone would call me to confirm. Awesome! There were details about all the options, and I didn’t have to talk to anyone or answer obtuse questions that would make me feel like I was being sized up the way I had been in the past – was I “sexually responsible” enough to get an IUD? Isn’t the fact that I want one responsible enough??? The website also provided detailed abortion options provided by the clinic. Providing information and access to such services acknowledges the reality that women live in a misogynist society where their words and choices are of less value than a man’s, creating situations where engaging in sexual activity without protection might actually be the safest option for many women.
For more information regarding abortion options as well as some great myth-busting
My Experience at Willow Clinic
I arrive for my appointment 20 minutes early. The woman at reception tells me I should hold off on going to the washroom – they will do a pregnancy test before my IUD insertion.
Eventually I am called up, buzzed through to the back. The same woman takes $75, the fee for a 5-year Copper IUD and insertion. This was the cost with my BC Care Card and no other extended medical coverage. I hand her cash (tips from my service job) and am given a purple receipt (for IUD pros and cons).
I meet Dr. Wiebe and relax immediately. She isn’t wearing a white coat – in fact, she’s in a t-shirt, jeans, and boots just like mine. She greets me with a genuine smile, no clipboard in hand. I am suddenly overcome with comfort – this clinic is for women, run by women, in as many ways as women can redefine the existing medical industrial complex and its doctor-patient power dynamic.
She confirms that I am getting the copper coil, and asks if I have any questions or concerns about anything I’ve heard or read on the internet…we go over my concerns, but she reminds me that in the worst case, I can come back to get it removed at any time.
During the insertion Dr. Wiebe continues to make easy conversation with me, letting me know when each item is coming into contact with my bits. She swiftly goes from one task to another, only explaining things when I let out a little groan. The process itself is not painful, just uncomfortable. She finishes up with an ultrasound to make sure everything is in place.
“My tongue is numb,” I say. She says it is a normal reaction and our bodies all respond in different ways. She tells me not to sit up just yet as I may be light-headed. I turn to the window – a beautiful north-facing view from the 10th floor on West Broadway.
The light-headedness passes in a minute, but I feel the cramps kicking in. I get dressed and Dr. Wiebe leads me to the recovery room, a cozy space with low beds and heated pads for my belly. The cramping is getting worse, but I was told to take an ibuprofen right before coming in. I’m glad I did. At this point, I realize that many women suffer from cramps like this during every period.
I stay put for another ten minutes, but the pain is getting worse and I just want to be at home with my cats for this part. I make an appointment six weeks from now to make sure everything is looking good, and get the heck out of there. I feel slight nausea on the bus, mostly due to the overwhelming pain – again women, I think a lot of you go through this every month. On the walk from the bus to my house, I feel some spotting. I get home just in time to clean up, grab a pad, and get cozy with my kitty cats. I wake up in an hour and the pain has subsided substantially!
Thinking back on my day, I am overwhelmed by my privileged position. Today I was able to follow through on a decision I made about my reproductive health without being grilled about my relationship status, sexual habits, etc. I made the decision to take extra precautions to avoid pregnancy, and was able to access care in a nonjudgmental environment. I think about last year, when the private Morgentaler Clinic in New Brunswick had to close down, declining access to abortion options by 60% for women in Eastern Canada. It reminds me that even Willow Women’s Clinic could disappear the same way, with a few decisions gone wrong. It reminds me that women worldwide are only just beginning to gain access to options for their health. Just another reason why we still need feminism…
IUD – Frequently Asked Questions
IUD Information / FemCaps / Diaphragms
Find other options for Birth Control here, as well as an effectiveness guide
- On April 24, 2015