What keeps me a Feminist?
What brought me to Feminism?
Secrets, silence, fear, and heartbreak
Have you ever felt your throat dry up, and your heart beat faster and faster and faster as you walk alone on the street? Have you ever heard the legitimacy of your lover’s gender debated? Have you ever been pushed out of a conversation that is about you? Have you ever had to tell a woman that the justice system will not offer her justice? Have you ever had to figure out how to accept the justice system not offering you justice? Have you ever held onto your silence with every drop of strength that remains in your bones? Have you ever lost language and culture because of colonization? Have you ever been told you don’t wear enough makeup, or that you wear too much? Have you ever blamed yourself over and over for the abuse, or assault you survived? Have you ever been scared to come out as a feminist? Have you ever felt like a piece of you didn’t survive?
What keeps me a Feminist?
Speaking out, speaking up, and putting the pieces of my heart back together
That moment where I realized it actually wasn’t my fault. That moment where I was able to hold a space for another woman to cry, process, be angry and be safe. That moment when I realized I can do whatever I want with myself. The moment when I could start trusting other women. The moment when I spoke about how colonization had hidden my ancestry. The moment when I realized that I need to and am part of decolonizing and indigenising. The moments that I continue to learn when to listen and when to speak. That moment when I understand why I need allies. The moments when I learn to be an ally. The moments where I truly, deeply believe in healing our bodies, ourselves and our communities. The moments that I realize I’ve got more to learn. The moments when I know to hold on tight. The moments when I reflect on how far I’ve come. The moment when, finger by finger, I can loosen my grip
Written by a Feminist
- On November 6, 2012